G is for Golden
So in a recent conversation with meggoo, she mentioned that amalier and I were the golden children in the family who could do no wrong. I think this deserves many responses, including: how amalier and bet are nowhere near golden children, and all the ways that Meg is golden.
But I'm editing this post, because as amalier states in the comments for this post, we need not focus on how we are not golden, but how we each are unique and lovely in our own ways. i paraphrase. so we read the non-golden bits once, and they can remain in the comments, but not on the main post, dearies.
So...
How Meg is golden:
- Being good to dad as kid.
- Sharing Dad's coloring, so he knows we're actually his.
- Babysitting for cousins - showing them a really good time.
- Being honest and truly caring about people.
- Always being good to and supportive of non-golden older sisters, who don't always treat Meggie well. Who sing at her until she cries.
- Trying again and again to have a relationship with Dad - living near him at times.
- Visiting Grandma and Poppa, cheering them up.
- Being Mom's best friend; taking care of her and enjoying it so Aimee and Beth don't worry.
- Helping Mom through extremely hard, lonely times, without complaint.
- Giving Mom someone to dote on, to feel responsible for.
- Taking care of poor, poor Brucie.
- Taking care of everything while Mom was out of town with Jolie, so she didn't have to worry.
- Cooking for Jolie.
- Cooking for Aimee's parties.
- Making Beth's wedding cake and shower food.
- Being at family parties. Getting to know the cousins.
- Always trying to see the good in everything and everyone.
and more!!!
Meg, you can add to these, too. C'mon, sissies.
posted by X Bethlehem @ 3:16 PM
10 Comments:
I will have to get back to this list.
Ways Meg is Not Golden
ahh 1. She stole change from her family from a very young age.
2. She is a thief.
3. She has the ability to give grief like grandma can.
4. "it's not me, it's you"
5. She let drugs rule her life.
6. She disowned her dad, but really doesn't know how to act it out.
7. Can be a couch potato.
8. Has a weakness for onion rings and coffee.
9. I have bounced more checks than I care to admit.
10. Bought a house with gradparents money then never paid the 150 bucks monthly mortgage, because of mentioned drug problem.
11. Wouldn't answer the phone when family was calling and trying to talk to me.
12. Screened phone calls. And then never called anyone for weeks.
13. Has held so many jobs, she isn't sure what to hold onto from the past.
14. Got kicked out of school for taking the wrap for drugs.
15. Generally out of her mind concerning what is right or wrong.
16. Stole from the rich to give to the poor. I thought I was a robin hood.
on and on and on.
I guess I am not the golden child. Maybe you two will have lists that say how you are from the "dark side".
And really. I wish beth that you wouldn't have such a list of yourself as being not a golden child, you should list why you are the golden child...add it to the bolgger. Brag a little. YOu are awesome to me!
Heres why Beth is the Golden Child!
1. Such a great dancer.
2. Such a knockout!
3. Has amazing style.
4. Is a kind person, really.
5. Is very smart.
6. You are like a mad scientist with the booze!
7. Funny, funny.
8. An amazing artist...drawer? doodler...painter.
9. Hard worker.
10. Writes keepsake birthday cards for her little sister.
11. Creatively stimulates her little sisters baking bug.
12. Actively seeks out information on food and culinary treats!
13. Has a genuine curiousity towards food and all things food like.
14. Is adventurous. I would never go camping!
15. married a man she believes in.
16. Was a good sister to Jolie.
17. Got along with Jolie.
18. Communicates well with Bill.
19. Treats momma to nice things.
20. Tells momma about her dreams.
21. Attempts to have a relationship with sad dad.
22. Invited sad dad to wedding.
23. Is talented like in every way. She sings, she dances, she acts!
You were a hard act to follow. We were always pretty different with our interest growing up, you liked debbie gibson and enya. I liked sports. YOu acted in West side story, I made mixed tapes at home. You sang and sang and then twirled a flag in funny outfits. I made sandwiches in the toaster oven, cooked mac n cheese and overate. I bit my nails. I think I beat you up when we were little, but if you say you hit me with a hanger, I don't remember that. I was messy and made chairs out of out a pile of clothes. You keep active and are generally motivating me to keep up. You just get better and better and as I say to my friends, my sisters get cooler the older they get.
You both are just so fascinating and really a lead lives that are really hard to keep up with. So I just do what I do, I am a gypsy.
i don't know that i agree that this was how this entry should have ended up. Now I'm all puffed up, while Meg was supposed to be reaffirmed.
THEN, Meg confesses that eating onion rings and drinking coffee makes her non-golden. I think we need to remember the topic here: how Meg is golden a golden child, to Mom. I think onion rings and coffee habits are definitely golden traits, in Mom's opinion. Especially if she can natch on em.
And I DID twirl flags in crazy outfits, but I would have rather been making mixed tapes and chairs from clothing piles.
And I DID like Debbie Gibson and Enya, but I count those as negatives.
And I was a thief, too, until I decided that karma was for real. Everything I stole brought me bad luck in one way or another, or broke, or never worked, or something. I don't steal anymore. But I think we all have to learn our own lessons.
Which school did you get kicked out of for some drug rap? And what drug rap?
I stole change from Jolie in Batavia, too. I think we all did.
And we all DEFINITELY screen phone calls.
golden child?
my lawd. we don't have any of those in this family!
i will start a list on myself tomorrow, and a list on the goodness of meggoo, and of our birdfriend. but none of us will ever, ever, in our best most-glowing, most-blinder-wearing, revisionist histories be golden. we are not those kind of girls. and we're much more real and spicy and war-torn and crazy passionate because of it. each in our own ways.
the bad stuff comes when we compare ourselves to each other. this should not be allowed to happen. we make each other stronger by being around each other. we make ourselves weaker by not allowing that energy and goodness to be part of our own supports.
its not a competition. and, even if it was, we've always played our own games and/or in our own ways. you can't judge betters or worses across such wide differences. you just can't. it's like saying "who's better -- jimi hendrix or abe lincoln?" everything is judged on it's own merits based on its own understanding of it goals and its definition of quality. negative points are always easy to find. this sort of judgment needs to be done with kindness to find the best information that will inspire growth. to compare anything to things outside of itself brings back only useless information, and sends one off into boundless questions and one big waste of time. and i should know. im a big time Evaluator in New York City.
ways we are Golden:
1. everything that we have chosen to shut off our emotions to, and just go along with for the sake of ease.
ways we are alive:
1. everything else.
and, are you kidding!? i could do no wrong?
i spent most of my time in oak lawn and orland grounded! my teenage angst and rebellion gave mom and dad something to align together upon.
i believe to this day that, outside of the church, it was one of the main factors that kept their marriage together for that long (real sorry bout that, y'all)
heh. "golden." right. how we paint our memories.
ways meggoo is full of goodness:
1. She believes in people.
2. She is open and honest.
3. She is a very loyal friend.
4. She doesn't hide her emotions.
5. She lets herself be passionate about things.
6. She is curious.
7. She relates well to all kinds of people.
8. She showed up to help aimee pack up her house without being asked or pleaded with.
9. She is a hard, hard worker.
10. She has good ideas, and is able to make plans to see them through.
11. She is very creative.
12. She likes onion rings and coffee.
13. She makes beautiful duct tape wallets (see -- if you had compared yerself to me, and said that that was my thang, you never woulda started making em. they're so different than mine, and way cool!)
14. She is a good explainer.
15. She is very patient.
16. She thinks things through and allows herself to change her mind.
17. She dreams big.
18. She is very smart and highly organized.
19. She is care-free and fun.
20. She's a good dancer.
21. She expresses her thoughts well in words, and in writing.
22. She is kind.
23. She is extremely generous.
24. She really wants to make the most of her talents, and not just get by.
25. She is puts up with amalier's grumpiness.
26. She explores things that might make her happier and healthier.
27. She is a fantastic driver.
28. She is fun.
29. She is trying to sort out the messed up messages we have learned about work and worth.
30. She makes herself give into her optimism and joyfulness.
31. She tries earnestly to figure out how to forge a relationship with messed up dad (who disowned us).
32. She knows when to take private space.
33. She helps momma stay happy, and makes sure she eats.
34. She whips up amazing foods for momma from slim fridge pickings like cocktail sauce, white wine, and whipped cream.
35. She visits, cooks for, and dos the bidding of grandma and grandpa.
36. She sings all songs with gusto, and has discovered songs her vocal range.
37. She treats others with respect.
there's many more.
bet next.
I agree, we aren't golden, But I can list somethings that are
1.Onion rings
2.the sun
3.bruce
4.glitter
5.gold
6.pizza puffs...golden delicious
7.and many many more
ooh, ooh -
24. she busts out on karaoke, after being anti-singsong for as long as we can remember.
25. she makes amazingly creative and thoughtful gifts.
There's more. I like concentrating on how we are wonderful, rather than listing how we are not. I'm going to change this post soon to accomodate that new liking. You'll see.
How Beth is not golden:
1. Ditching little sister meggoo time and again for childhood friends.
2. Hitting little sister meggoo with a hanger. And fists. And feet.
3. Being completely self-absorbed as a child.
4. Emotional breakdowns in singing/dancing childrens' group.
5. Emotional breakdowns in high school.
6. Emotional breakdowns in ballet ventures.
7. "Almost running off" to a militant commune at age 19.
8. Getting married to an insecure closeted transvestite she knew for 3 days at age 20.
9. Showing up for brunch after family marriage-recognition party with neckful of purple hickeys. Grossing family out.
10. Divorcing insecure closeted transvestite one year later.
11. Bad marriage manifesting in heavy ways y'all know about.
12. Telling ultra-christian dad about heavy ways, adding that he just needs to deal.
13. Getting involved with abusive alcoholic shortly after leaving first husband. Ditching little sister again on her last week in town for first date with guy.
14. Being barely present, hostile, snobby, and defensive at family functions.
15. Leaving abusive alcoholic, only to go back to him again.
16. Staying with abusive alcoholic as he turns into caring partner. Being an emotional wreck, most of the time.
17. Not showing up at important family functions.
18. Making family do most of the work for my wedding. Not letting them know that they're going to be working until day of wedding.
19. Not being at Fish Lake for Jolie's last healthy period.
20. Addressing personal issues with anger, rather than patience and love.
There's more. Just wait.
You know, we didn't list any ways that Amalier is golden. I shall start this list:
1. Started hugging (and tackling) sisters first, opening up veins of love and physical closeness amongst us all.
2. Is the hippest person we all know.
3. Defended little sisters against bad beaus
4. Never, ever made little sisters feel unwelcome.
5. Let little sisters tease, hang off of, and decorate high school boyfriend with whipped cream and streamers in good humor.
6. Has the coziest bed in the world.
7. Teaches girls to be badass.
8. Is smart and independent, and unapologetic for it.
9. Is unafraid to drastically change hair.
10. Eats very healthily.
11. Cooks amazing fish, dips, homemade breads, sushi, and other just-whipped-it-up party foods.
12. Throws the best parties in town.
13. Sent gift boxes to little sisters during college.
14. Went to live with Jolie, despite terrible mixed signals from sister and continuous hostility from Bill.
15. Tells the truth about the Girl Scouts.
16. Comes to Chicago to be with Meggoo and Momma a lot.
17. Tries hard to make things fun, and succeeds.
18. Takes care of poor, poor Brucie for Momma and Meggoo and feeds him the right cheeses and tunafishes.
19. Has a very cool and loving partner, who is very nice to sisters and amalier.
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